people that do good deeds still excist!

On Saturday the girls and I went to the store so we could let Erick sleep a little longer, it was cold, wet, and snowy, so you can imagine how hard it was to go out with Nai'a and Xanti in such horrible weather, the snow was blowing all over and Xanti's car seat was soaked, Nai'a on the other was enjoying the weather, stomping in the snow, getting wet, and getting dirty slushy snow all over the car. Not so exciting for me!!! Having to carry Xanti in a car seat that seems to be heavier than her and trying to keep track of Nai'a, since she seems to think she no longer needs to hold my hand. After all she is a big girl now. When I entered the store everything changed, I was greeted nicely by everyone we passed with smiles and nice hello's everyone seemed to be in great spirit. We were finally done shopping and surprisingly both girls were very well behaved, now I had to face the dreaded weather again that only seemed to be getting worst. there I was trying to get Nai'a in her car seat without getting much mud in the car while in the mean time Xanti was getting a little snowed on. Finally I got her in, now I faced another challenge lifting the car seat with Xanti inside of it and when you are 4 ft. 9 1/2 in. lifting a car seat with baby out of the top part of the shopping cart can be a little challenging. at this point was when an older lady walked over and offered a helping hand. What an angel...I find it very hard now a days to find strangers that are willing to help another stranger in need. It doesn't end there, We drove back to Oakley to by meat at the local store, I find the meat to be allot fresher and cheaper there. We were leaving and a gentleman stopped what he was doing and opened the door for us, I thanked him but he then asked, "which car is yours?" I told him and he walked over to it and opened the back door so that I could put the girls in. I was blown away... nice people that just want to do something nice without receiving anything but a simple Thank you and Marry Christmas are still out there.

I'm the type of person that if you are standing behind me in a long line waiting to pay and you only have a few things I will let you go ahead of me even if I have my two girls. If you have a stroller and baby aboard I will hold the door for you sometimes I may not be going to the same store, I just don't have the heart to walk away from someone that needs help. If I see you and you are in need and I can help I don't walk away. When people help me I feel entirely grateful to them.

I write this because many times I have gone shopping or gone out to pay a few bills and needed someone to open a door or hand me something I just dropped because my hands were full and people just walk right by me. It makes me sad to know that the niceness in the world is disappearing.

So, if you are are out and about and can lend a helping hand don't hesitate to do so it could mean the world to someone.

Birthday/Thanksgiving

Erick had a birthday, November 26th. He is now 26. Time has really flown I met Erick when he was 17 so it's been almost 10 years and what a journey it's been with more yet to come.

We didn't do anything big since Thanksgiving was the following day. We went to Salt Lake and ate tacos al pastor then drove back to his parents house and enjoyed a homemade chocolate cake with a cherry cream frosting, which I made for him, at his special request and it was totally yumshus. mmmm...that's going in my recipe book! we hung out with his family then went home.

Thanksgiving,

I made my first turkey, (I can't believe I didn't take pictures) I have to say it was the best turkey I have ever had. To be honest I don't really like turkey but this turkey was delish. I let it marinate over night and Five hours later the next day it was cooked to perfection, so filled with flavor and oh so moist. I also made the mashed potatoes, a corn dish and my mom's famous bite size meat balls to snack on. My sister-in-law Mirelle made The green bean casserole, pumpkin cheesecake and sweet yams, my mother-in-law made apple pie the drink, the roles and provided her home, needless to say we had a delicious feast. We toasted and went around the table saying what we were thankful for.

So many things to be thankful, our families, jobs, health, for us being able to live in this country, the gospel, gods constant guidance and protection, our homes, our friends,and the list goes on. I love the holidays, I love spending extra time with our loved ones and the food is so good, but this is also a time when I get a little, ok allot nostalgic since I have no immediate family to share it with no mom, dad, sister, or brother. This is why I am extra thankful for Erick's family. I am not treated like the daughter-in-law or the sister-in-law but as a daughter and a sister I think that if you were a stranger looking in on our family you would think I was the daughter and Erick the son-in-law, I have such a special bond with Erick's family I truly feel loved and welcomed, and That is what I am most thankful for.

Truly extraordinary

Today I was looking trough some papers in my files, I needed the girls social security number for some paper work I was filling out. While searching I came across both of there birth certificates and read them then I searched through some more and found Leith's, our diciest son's birth certificate, I had forgotten how much he weighted 1 lb 4 oz. he was just a about an inch taller than a dollar bill. It's strange to think of him that tiny because when he was born and I saw him he was tiny, yet he didn't seem that small, but now reading and looking back he was very tiny.

After reading his birth certificate I read his death certificate, I can't believe we already have a death certificate in our little family. I couldn't help feeling sad, my stomach all of a sudden is upset and I can't help but replay that day in my mind. I am feeling a little sad because after reading the causes of death on the certificate I researched a little on them and it seemed he was in allot of pain and discomfort. I wish I could have bared some of his pain in those 4 short days. I've been missing him lately "I guess the sadness of loosing a child never completely goes away, it does get better but it doesn't go away."

The other night Erick was sitting on the floor playing with both the girls, they were having so much fun, I was making dinner and looked over at them, I couldn't help the taught of seeing Leith playing there too, it was such a strong thought I could see him there for a second. I asked Erick if he thought Leith would ever visit us, he answered yes. I hope it is soon. Sometimes when I can't go to sleep at night or when I just all of a sudden wake up, I look around the room hoping to see him, I have a few friends that say they have had visits from there diciest loved ones, sometimes more than once and I can't help but wonder and hope it will happen to me.

Sometimes I think of the things I could have done that maybe could have prevented his death and then I remember it wasn't ment to be prevented I accepted this trial and so did he. I should be happy and grateful for having the opportunity to be the mother of such a special boy he was saved from the wickedness of this world all he needed was a body and what he did for Erick and I in just four days was something I hope I can achieve in my lifetime. he brought two souls, two special children of our heavenly father back to him. "In just four days, He is truly extraordinary!"

Nai'a's birthday

My beautiful princesa

I know it's a little late but Nai's turned three- years-old on September 30th. CRAZY!!! can't believe she is already three, all though she acts like she is thirteen. HELP!!! What will I do when she is really thirteen? We had a family dinner and cake on her actual birthday, then on October 11th we had a princess birthday party. I know you are probably asking "why so late?" We didn't want to have it before which would be September 27th, the following weekend would have been perfect but... it was General Conference, our next option was the weekend after conference which brings us to October the 11th. It was a blast! She enjoyed every bit of it and that's all that matters right? she got many gifts and we had most of our close friends come. the food was yumshus! ( made by my mother-in-law) treats were made by me. I made magic wands (white chocolate covered pretzel rods with m&m's, flower sandwiches, and chocolate cups (they say those were yumshus too). I made homemade crowns with jewels for the guest and the party bags I cut in shape of castles. Tia Mirelle helped me decorate (Thanks it was so pretty!). I even made a Pinata ( pink hot air balloon shape) which didn't last very long I should have done more layers of paper mache but Erick said to not do it to thick other wise the kids weren't going to be able to brake it. " well he was wrong" (kids are stronger than we think). We danced and played a few games. "What a fun party!"... but I don't think we will be doing one for while. Xanti had started to teeth that day and she just cried historically for the second half of the night, I was really frustrated and tiered. I guess we'll have to throw Xanti a one-year-old party and a three-year-old party just so they don't say we favored one more than the other when they are older, and then we are done throwing BIG patties for some years. They are lots of work! They are worth it just to see your kids happy but I think I can only handle a few for each child in one life time.

Well, here are some pictures of her princess party

Nai'a casting a spell

Nai'a and cousin Sean... How cute!

This is what happens when you give a three-year-old dress up eye shadow.

Playing musical chairs

Dale! Dale! Dale!

All the kids collecting candy

Queremos pastel!


Papa and his little princess Xanti

Carlitos and Mariely Aquin (such beautiful kids!)


Nai'a with the Howard girls (we love you)


Nai'a with the Kerr's (Thanks for being such great examples)

Singing happy birthday and las mananitas

eating the cake

Count your many blessings

I've been wanting to post this for a while, now I finally have the time.

A few weeks ago the girls and I went for a drive to Park City, it was a Saturday, I figured we could hit a few yard sales and in the mean time let Erick sleep a little longer on his day of. I didn't get much , just some random stuff nothing to exciting. On the drive back both my girls were asleep, the radio was off and it was in complete silence, I started to admire the drive and think about life. I had been so stressed about a few things going on that I had forgotten about how blessed I really am. So that was the moment, the moment I thought about the many blessings I have. My husband is a wonderful man. He is very thoughtful, he has always provided us with what we need and a little more, he supports everything I do even my not so bright ideas, he has never stopped me from doing what I want. He loves the savior and our heavenly father and has a strong testimony of the true church. Erick loves me with all he is and shows it in many ways. I have two beautiful little girls , they are both healthy , smart and very special. The lord has never left us alone, he has always protected us and has blessed me with the companionship of the holy ghost. Just that morning I was driving to Park City a bit over the speed limit and all of a sudden I thought " just because it's daylight doesn't mean I can drive this fast I still don't know what's up ahead, I'd better slow down." Right when I started to slow down a deer ran across, I would have hit it had I not listened to the spirit telling me to slow down. I am so thankful for the gift of the holy ghost what would I be without it? I am blessed with having great in-laws, they support us in so many ways. When I need a break from the girls my mother in-law is always willing to watch them, they are both great parents and great friends to me I could not have asked for better in-laws. I have good health, we live in a nice place we have the truth in our lives, that's a big one I always think of how hard it is to not know what your purpose in this life is. How hard it is to not know why we are here and what will happen after this life. I'm blessed to know the truth and to know why, why we suffer and why we feel joy, why there is good and also much evil. It is to hard to just live day to day not knowing the purpose of this life not knowing why we are even here who made us and if being good is even worth it. I'm so grateful to my heavenly father for helping me find these answers. I'm thankful for prayer especially the prayers of thanks. It feels so good to be able to offer a prayer of thanks, nothing else but thanks. I think it's something we should all do from time to time, thank our creator for this beautiful world he has given us to enjoy, thank him for our families, our friends, our health, our jobs the trials that are sent to us and just simply our existence.

These are some pictures from the drive to my house. How can one not be thankful for the beautiful things the wold is made up of?

About Xanti/Parenting

Xanti is now four month's...CRAZY!!! I can't believe it, time really does fly. Xanti is a happy little baby that is filling our house with many smiles with dimples. She is getting cuter by the day, she gu's and ga's ALOT now, she grabs everything and anything "watch your earings around her" I love her so much! When she hears my voice she starts looking for me. Xanti is starting to interact more with her sister, they play this silly game where Nai'a comes running up to her and says silly things that I can't even understand, anyway it makes Xanti laugh allot. She giggles and is ticklish. She doesn't sleep very good anymore, I have to admit I really truly long for a good night sleep I don't think I remember what sleeping eight hours without interruptions feels like. We've given up eating out, between Xanti wanting to eat or being poopy right when they bring my food and Nai'a not being able to sit still and trying to make conversation with the table next to, across from or behind us, eating out has just become impossible.

Now, would I trade my two beautiful girls for a good nights sleep and eating out at a restaurant? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I love my girls, they make me a better person. I love having them both sit on my lap, Nai'a's little arms wrapped around my neck and Xanti will occasionally look up at me, her eyes sparkle with happiness, it's like she is saying thank you mom, I love you every time she looks up at me.

Raising children is not an easy task, they don't come with a manual so we have to rely on good advice from other parents, our own judgment, our prayers for help from the all mighty to help, good books and just learning from our mistakes.

Sometimes we think that we are so patient but really it is them that are patient with us, they've been put in our inexperienced hands hoping we love them, teach them and help them back to our heavenly father safely. It's a hard task possibly the hardest, but how rewarding is the job of a loving parent, the endless hugs and kisses, sometimes for no particular reason, those playful moments that make us forget our problems and fears. I would never trade my girls for anything , I gain so much from being a mother to them. I am so thankful for this opportunity that the lord has given me to raise such beautiful special spirits. I'm learning each day and sometime struggle to live up to the part but, each day I am rewarded with something you can't find in the world of man, something that can't be bought, and that is the love of a child, a love so real and so true that you can feel it without a single word having to be said and a single action having to be made. Thank you Nai'a and xanti. I love you.

Here are some pictures of cute little Xanti

What's Nai'a up to?

Nai'a has been enjoying mami and papi taking her to all the playgrounds and the spoiling of abuelo y abuela. They really do spoil her ,I don't think they ever tell her NO. Hey what are grandparents for? She can be quit a little brat at times but over all she is a great loving smart "very smart" almost three year old. WOW!!! I can't believe she is almost three I feel as if yesterday she was gooing and gaaing in my arms. all of a sudden she is dancing around ( she truly has a love and Passion for dancing) She loves lip stick, perfume, new shoes, boots in particular, modeling new clothes, blush, gum, lotion, sanitizer and washing her hands. We have potty training pretty much mastered except for nights. (so if you have any tips please share.) she really does love her baby sister even though she smothers her at times and I am constantly telling her to be gentle but when I put Xanti down for a nap and Nai'a doesn't see her she asks and looks for her, she says she is sorry for what ever bad thing she does to her and then gives her kisses. I love it when she plays with Xanti's feet because Xanti loves it and laughs so cute. I can't wait to see them really play. I love Nai'a so very much and sometimes I find myself looking at her and thinking... "I can't believe she is really mine" I feel so blessed to have her and watching her grow up seems so... I don't even have the words to express what I feel. I am enjoying her company so much more now. the other day we baked cookies together and she also helped me wash the dishes another day. I remember dreaming of this moment, back then I thought it would never come and now today it's here and I almost feel as if it got here to fast I enjoy it but it also means she is growing and becoming more of an individual. I don't know how I feel about her doing more of her own thing. She is so beautiful, she loves people, she says hi,bye and thank you to everyone she says her prayers all on her own and that makes me proud. I love you Nai'a and Xanti

Here are some pictures of My beautiful Nai'a

What have I been up to?

Me, well I've been with the girls running after Nai'a and making Xanti smile. I've been having great friends over for lunch, I really enjoy having them over, so please keep coming. I seem to be spending a lot of time in playgrounds and I don't know how many times a day I say " Nai'a no, please leave you sister alone, she is just a baby, she is your sister do you want her to cry?" I think I automatically repeat that now. I do get to enjoy watching her give her little sister a kiss and hug once in a while. that's always nicer that my everyday frase. I have been taking lots of long afternoon naps with my girls. I love it they both snuggle up to me and I just wouldn't trade that for anything. even if Erick makes fun of me, he says I sleep more that a new born pup, oh well I get to snuggle with my girls while I'm at it.

I got a new hair cut, not to thrilled about it. OK so I told the girl I wanted it shoulder length curly, amm she cut SIX inches of even after I told her to be careful because my hair is super curly. What was she thinking??? obviously not shoulder length. I don't mind it as much any more, it will grow right? what do you think? You like?

STRAIGHT

CURLY

erick update

So, Erick started a new job at Adidas, he totally loves it, he comes home with a new shirt or something at least once a week, with the excuse that he "needs it for work." Yea right he just loves the clothes and everything else there.

One of the most exciting things has happened to him at work. Last Wednesday two of his very favorite soccer players walked into the store, he almost died when they walked in, he helped them out and got to chat with them a little, he "had to" buy a Mexico team shirt so they could sign it. ("see what I mean here we go with the buying again") They were going to play that night and told Erick they would leave him tickets at the hotel they were staying at so he could go see them, he took his dad. how fun!!! It was so cute to see him as excited as a little boy getting his first soccer ball. His team lost. BUMMER!!! but at least he was there to cheer them on.




How cool is this???

Thank You Leith

Five years ago tomorrow August 18th I gave birth to a baby boy. Leith Angel Cabrera. Leith was born four months early so the chances of his survival were very slim. He was a fighter, he lived four days and then the Lord called him back home.

It's been a struggle to live life without him. For the first about six months I was mad, mad at God. How could he have done this to me? I loved my baby from the moment I knew he excited I had all these plans and dreams. I truly anticipated the day I would hold him in my arms and rock him, the day he would take his first step, the day I would push him on a swing, his first day school, the day he would serve a mission and then find a good wife. Never in a thousand thoughts did I imagine I wouldn't get to walk these footsteps with my son. I couldn't even Begin to try to understand why this had happened to me. I shut myself out of everything and everyone. there was nothing anyone could say or do to bring him back so I wanted nothing to do with anyone. That was a hard thing to over come I almost lost my husband, the love of my life because of the way I had decided to deal with this big trial. I always said I believed in the plan and that I trusted God, but when this happened I realized how weak my testimony really was. What I affirmed I believed had now turned into a great uncertainty.

I wasn't exactly living righteously at the time, in fact my testimony was just talk and no action, so that made it even harder. I started to realize I was loosing everything including myself, I sat down on my bed one night and analyzed my life and what I truly wanted, I remembered my baptism and how strongly I felt the spirit when the missionary sisters taught me. I truly felt that what they taught me was true, so then why wasn't I living by it? "Wake up Yonessy enough is enough". "Today is the day". "No more"! It was time to start accepting my trial and asking, What? What do you want me to learn from this? Not why did you do this to me?

Erick had shared with me his feelings about eternal families. "see baby, we haven't lost him forever", he would say. That was hard to believe since we hadn't even entered the temple. He tried to help me as much as he could but I couldn't except, my soul ached, I felt as though the reason to live had been lost. so He said to me, "I have tried to help you, and there is nothing else I can do. What you need to do is pray for some kind of revelation, that's what you need to do". Ask God". So a week before I decided to start asking what instead of why I did what Erick suggested I prayed and asked for something to help me with my pain. The Lord answered about a week after my plead. I had a dream, Leith was about three or four and he was in a crib standing up and reaching out his hand though the bars and he said to me "Mama don't cry for me anymore, I'm OK and I'm waiting for you." That's what made me analyze my life and make the decision to start accepting.

Of course I want to see my son again, yes I want to be his eternal mother.It was as if I could see again. The Lord saw we were drifting away from his path, he loves us so much that he sent us a trail to help us back to the right road. He sent us Leith to push us back to him to make us want eternal life, he know we wouldn't want to be left without the opportunity to raise our son. He knew that would help guide us back.

It's been a long journey and many many tears have rolled down my cheeks it really has not been an easy road, but thanks to Leith's death we are an eternal family I believe that had he not come and left I would still be lost living an unworthy pointless life. It's been a struggle to realize the purpose of this hard trial but, today I can say I am living and feeling happy about my life even though at times I do find myself shedding a few tears, they are different kind of tears, it's hard to explain but they are not painful tears more like longing, longing to be with my son. I must admit I do let my mind drift a little and wonder what it would have been like to raise him, what kind of personality he would have had and what he would have looked like. I'm thankful for the lord's plan and for the choice I made to follow it. I know that if I continue to follow heavenly father's plan the time will come where I won't have to wonder what it would have been like, I will know what it's like, I will be reunited with my son. The time that I lost on earth without him won't even matter because I'll have him for eternity.

I want to take this time to thank my loving husband for standing by me and never leaving me alone. I want to thank him for never giving up on us and for his strong testimony that during the first years while I was struggling to gain mine served as an anchor for the both of us.

I'd like to thank God for choosing us to bare this trial and be eternal parents to such a special being. he is our Angel.
I love you Leith and I will never stop being amazed by what a big impact your very short life left on our family. I love you. sigue esperandonos en el cielo. TE AMO

missing home

Lately I've been so so home sick. I feel so distant and alone.
I wish I could sit on my moms lap and have her nibble on my ears like she did when I was a little girl. I miss her peeking in at me late at night to see if I was OK. I use to wake up an hour earlier just so I could crawl into her bed and cuddle.
If I close my eyes really really tight and think about home and the family I left behind I could almost hear the sound of the music playing in the streets, I wave back at the people that walk by, some complete strangers yet the urge to pass on the love and joy they feel in there simple lives is so valuable. I could almost feel the breeze cooling my body from such a hot day. I can see my mom pulling me up to dance bachata while we wait for the rice to cook. Now I'm jumping off a cliff and land into the perfect clear blue water... a perfect splash. I can hear my friends cheering me on as we begin to walk up the cliff to do all over again. I can smell the salt in the sea and hear the airplane flying up above. the sky is so blue there is barley a cloud insight. Now I am on our balcony hanging out with my mom. she loves it when I run my fingers through her hair and painting her toenails has always been my favorite... she has perfect feet. i miss eating her food so much and yet no matter how hard I try I can't remember what it taste like. I can't help but wonder... will I ever see her again in this life? Will I get to taste her delicious food once again? Will I be able to feel her tender loving arms wrapped around me once more? or will I have to wait until the next life to feel the joy of having my mother next to me?
My mother has taught me things that make me who I am today. I am a sharing person thanks to her. I remember that whenever she went to a friends house they would give her candy or a chocolate and she would always bring me half no matter the size or how good it was she always saved me half. I have a strong relationship with the savior because ever since I was little she talked to me about him and when I was sick she always told me to stay close to him and ask him for strength. My mother is my best friend and my hero. I only pray that I may be the kind of mother she is. If I can love my girls the way she loves me I know my girls will turn out great and will never feel alone in this world where a good friend can be hard to come by.

Erick

Erick... is a great man. He always thinks before he speaks, so he almost always says the right things. He knows how to make you laugh or at least put a smile on your face. He doesn't like to give much detail (I hate that) and your secrets will die with him. Erick is super understanding and will give you the shirt of his back. I can't believe I'm married to such a great guy, he has many admirable qualities that I'm excited to see my girls learn. He is super organized(at least one of us is...) he likes to spend quiet days at home watching movies and spending time with his girls, even if we drive him insane, after all there are three of us, and we are all attention seekers. He loves good food (luckily his wife makes great food)and soccer is his Passion. when it comes to the family, we are always first. I could keep going, but I think I'd better stop. All I can say is what a great blessing to have him be my eternal companion.

Yonessy

It's had to write about me. I know who I am, but when it comes to putting it in writting it gets a little hard. I'm happy with the person I became, there is always room to grow and always something I could work on but all around I'm happy with me. I'm a very caring, giving, loving person. I love to do nice things for people specialy my family and friends, I would much rather give than recieve.I love to spend time with Erick and the girls, they are my life. I like to dance Merengue, bachata and salsa and I could talk for days if you let me. I think I'm the best bargin shoper ever. I once baught a winter coat that cost $180.00 original price for $10.00 (that's how good I am!)I love having the knolege of knowing why I'm here on Earth and knowing that all these happy times don't end here and the hard times they will end. I'm super in love with my husband, I'm so blessed to have him by my side. My girls...well they keep me on my feet and make me try even harder to be a better person. I'm happy we aren't just a family here on Earth but that we are eternal.

My Xanti

I had Xanti almost 3 months ago (pronounced Shanty) Yes we know it means shack in English but, it's not an English name. Xanti is from a native Mexican tribe and it means flower
We could never find out what we were having she was always positioned wrong, so we decided to stop trying to find out and let it be a surprise. Well what a surprise! we were always sure she was a boy my pregnancy was so different to when I was pregnant with Nai'a. I was carrying different, everything was just different. We even got boys clothes and only took boys clothes to the hospital. What a great surprise when the nurse told us we had a little girl." no wonder the boy name we had picked out just never seemed to convince us". We call Xanti her dad's clone,she is identical to him.
Xanti sleeps pretty. Her eyes are pure love and when she smiles at me I get fuzzies in my tummy. how could this little being that can't talk or do much bring so many feelings of love and joy. She truly is our beautiful flower. (Her second name is Sesasi, also native, it means beautiful)

My Nai'a

Let me introduce you to our almost 3 year old daughter Nai'a.I can't believe I'm a mother to such an extraordinary special little girl. She truly is full of life. Nai'a is super smart and not shy at all, she is very polite and loves to talk. she sure does have a lot of energy.
Not to long ago we hiked up Mnt Timpanogos, Nai'a walked up at least half the way. I'm sure she walked more, she also walked through out the whole tour and some of the way back down. All of this she did in the hot sun, she finally told us she was tiered on the way back down so dad carried her. we then went to have a bite. the drive was short maybe 15 minutes, that's all she needed to charge up. she was ready to go go go again. her energy is what keeps me going each day. and there is nothing like a big hug from her each morning. I love her.

The name
I'm not quite sure where or how but one day Erick started calling me biba and then I thaught... "well if he can call me biba then I'm going to call him bibo". so that's how we got to be Da Bibos